(no subject)
Sep. 4th, 2009 05:03 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
elizabethSo I was doing this writing exercise over at Read Write Poem. Parts 1-3a were fine, and then: List things/events that you want to forget (again, 5 minutes).
I wanted to throw up, and then when I swallowed down the bile and decided to try, I couldn't think of anything — I hate forgetting information more than I can say, and the events in my life that I would like to forget I have apparently repressed so well that I can't access them on demand, only when they are triggered. Even the horrible things that I have not repressed and can call up at will, I do not want to forget. I want to learn from them, I have to learn from them, or else I won't survive, in some very important and fundamental way.
I am not sure if this is good. I am not sure what this says about me and memory and trauma.
I wanted to throw up, and then when I swallowed down the bile and decided to try, I couldn't think of anything — I hate forgetting information more than I can say, and the events in my life that I would like to forget I have apparently repressed so well that I can't access them on demand, only when they are triggered. Even the horrible things that I have not repressed and can call up at will, I do not want to forget. I want to learn from them, I have to learn from them, or else I won't survive, in some very important and fundamental way.
I am not sure if this is good. I am not sure what this says about me and memory and trauma.
