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Looking at this enneagram test made me a little sniffly tonight. It was so hard to answer a lot of questions because so much of my behavior over the last four years has changed because of my depression. I have become so much more aware of the weaknesses in my character — I knew I procrastinated when I was 17, but when I was 20, procrastinating and avoidance came damn close to fucking up what I had wanted for my life since I was a child. I have learned to be cautious, to hold back, to watch myself, and while this behavior keeps me healthy, keeps me functioning, I wish I still ...I wish I didn't feel like second-guessing myself was so necessary, maybe. Something like that.
In many ways, the person I was at 17 was a stronger, more myself-ish, person than I have been ever since. Or maybe I'm just falsely nostalgic. Some days, I feel like depression took everything from me and it left the gaps; my experience of depression was primarily one of diminishment.
In many ways, the person I was at 17 was a stronger, more myself-ish, person than I have been ever since. Or maybe I'm just falsely nostalgic. Some days, I feel like depression took everything from me and it left the gaps; my experience of depression was primarily one of diminishment.